Swift kick to the arse right there.

Alright… so I was just on my board, surfing the web, and then, all of a sudden, a MASSIVE wave of awesomeness wiped me out. It also had quite a lot in common with the new project I was working on a little while ago, and it caused a nice motivation surge. The wave consisted of this picture:

You can't see it?! You've been deprived of awesomeness. Sorry about that. :P

WIN, WIN, SO MUCH WIN!

I. WILL. CONTINUE. DRAGON. STORM.

(after sleep. :P)

Hail to the king, baby!

Been a while, eh? Well, that’s mainly because no-one actually reads this shit. Oh, speaking of shit, this site is. πŸ˜› I still don’t like it. No empty lines allowed, a gay choice of themes, limited customisation, and the “possibly related” posts are, frankly, insulting. I like the massively reduced RAM usage, though, that’s nice. And the spam blocker is handy, as well as the site stats page, which mainly shows that people are searching for “rodney reynolds soundboard”, arriving at the correct blog post, and then NOT DOWNLOADING IT. >.>

If you DO read this shit and have something to say, then by all means comment. And that goes for any DAZ Studio models that you see on my blog and want but can’t find, eg: the Phenotypes. I’ll give you links if you just ask nicely. Honestly, it’d be nice to know that all of my views aren’t generated solely from accidental clicks or spambots. πŸ˜‰ I won’t eat your face, I’m not a Protozoid Slimer… πŸ˜›

Yes, Protozoid Slimer. Those evil slimy green things with teeth on Duke Nukem 3D, which I’ve been playing recently. Partly because most modern games are pathetic in comparison, and partly in celebration that Duke Nukem (Taking) Forever HAS A FREAKIN’ RELEASE… YEAR. πŸ˜€ No, that’s NOT a joke.

After the Duke Nukem Forever dev team broke up and 3D Realms downsized, Gearbox (the guys behind the shit-awesome Borderlands) got the Duke Nukem IP, and they’re finishing it off for 2011. Again, I’m not kidding – check Gearbox, 3D Realms and Wikipedia if you don’t believe me. πŸ˜› Finally, 14 years after DN3D, it’s coming! πŸ˜€ I’m excited; I’m anticipating it more than any other game that’s gonna be out anytime soon (moreso than Portal 2), but I’m also kinda anxious. Is it gonna be the most awesome thing since Duke Nukem 3D, or has it been passed around too many engines and lost its soul because of the amount of time the devs have had to work on it? One thing’s for sure – faggots… sorry, CRITICS are gonna give it a shit score because it’s been in development too long, they can’t give it more than Halo Retch because that would make them look bad, and because it’s Duke Nukem and some people don’t seem to “get” his amazing style. Three things they should NOT knock points off for, but they will. πŸ˜›

But, do you know the greatest thing about all this? Because I own Borderlands and all the DLC, I got an EARLY ACCESS KEY. πŸ˜€ Hell yeah.

Looking forward to Duke Nukem Forever, but for now, Duke Nukem 3D. I don’t REALLY need to tell you how awesome it is, do I? πŸ˜‰ It was almost TOO awesome when I played it as a kid (yeah, it was an 18, I know, but it’s not as if I thought it was REAL… :P). I never had the original, I had the upgraded Atomic Edition, complete with the super-difficult fourth episode, The Birth. Not like it mattered back then, because I couldn’t even clear the second episode on the easiest difficulty. πŸ˜›

Nowadays, there’re a truckload of ports for DN3D to help it run on modern Windows, the best in my opinion being EDuke32. Combine that with the sickeningly good High Resolution Pack and the brilliant DukePlus mod (which surprised me, because mods usually break everything (I don’t like the new sounds and some of the new weapons and features though, but you can just turn them off)), then pump up the difficulty to “Come Get Some” or “Damn I’m Good”. The result is a shooter which I personally think is a more entertaining, exciting, fun and geniuinely challenging experience than ANY shooter I’ve ever played. I’m not counting Borderlands, because that’s a special kind of shooter with random weaponry and significant RPG elements, not just a “generic” shooter with fixed weapons, etc. But DN3D IS better than every other generic shooter I’ve played, including TimeSplitters 3 and its amazing humour, Mass Effect 2 and its ridiculously good character development and excellent battle system, and Modern Warfare’s campaign which plays so smoothly and manages to hold your attention so well it might as well be a stripper’s arse.

That might sound like a stupid claim to all you NEWFAGS out there. But you’re newfags and play games for their graphics. You think Crysis is better than anything. And you actually care about kill-death ratios. No-one should like you. Not even your parents. πŸ˜›

Seriously, if you’ve never played it before, you just HAVE to. And if you have, you’ll be surprised at the amazing job the modding community’s done on modernising it. Get yourself a copy of Duke Nukem 3D Atomic Edition (gog.com or other method), get the High Resolution Pack and install it, then get the updated version of EDuke32 and copy it over the old version that the HRP installed for you. Choose your options in the menus while listening to one of my favourite theme tunes ever, and you’re set for awesomeness. πŸ™‚ Don’t put the difficulty on “Piece of Cake”, though. Unless you’re 7. πŸ˜›

On the subject of Multiplayer, there’s a basic version implemented into EDuke32 which apparently works well over a LAN. It’s a bit of a faff, though, so you’ll want to try a multiplayer frontend. Try YANG or Meltdown, the latter being the one I quite like the look of. I can’t really judge, because I haven’t been able to try multiplayer YET. I tried to test it by myself, but EDuke32 babs itself when you try to run two instances at the same time, and the game acts as if you’re in single player if you start a multiplayer game with only one player (you can pause, save, etc.). πŸ˜›

Anyway, have fun. I’m off to kick ass and chew bubblegum. See ya later. πŸ™‚

…hey… where the hell’s all my gum?!

Haha, nice try.

UPDATE!!

Holy crap. This site is shit… WordPress doesn’t even let you put a FRIGGIN’ EMPTY LINE in an entry! It automatically closes up all whitespace. Even if you put it there on purpose to make the entry EASIER TO READ. So, sorry if you can’t read this very well, this faggit site I’ve been dumped onto is crap.

Blog entry starts HERE:

I just recieved two e-mails, from both Adobe and Skype. Well… when I say “Adobe” and “Skype”, I actually mean “phishers who want to steal my password or load my PC with a trojan/virus/worm/other nasty, but don’t know who they’re dealing with”. πŸ˜›

These are the e-mails:

ADOBE PDF READER SOFTWARE UPGRADE NOTIFICATION

This is to remind that a new version of Adobe Acrobat Reader with enhanced features for viewing, creating, editing, printing and internet-sharing PDF documents has been released.

To upgrade your application:

+ Go to http://www.adobe-reader-upgrade.com
+ Get your options, download and upgrade.

DOWNLOAD ADOBE ACROBAT READER

Thanks and best regards,

Ken William

Adobe Acrobat Reader Support

Copy rights Adobe 2010 Β© All rights reserved
1005 Marrinbird Rd | Merryton | CA | 96523 | USA
Website : http://www.adobe-acrobat-upgrade.com

And…

Valued Skyper,

On behalf of Skype Inc, we sincerely thank you for your as-always trust and supports. As a valued customer, you can enjoy ever more enhanced features from “Get More Out Of Skype” (learn more at http://www.skype-voip-upgrade.com).

What can you find in this upgrade?

+ Do amazing things for free: Voice and video calls to anyone else on Skype; Conference calls with three or more people; Instant messaging, file transfer and screen sharing.
+ Call landlines and mobiles worldwide (for around 44 countries, and we are adding more soon).
+ Access WiFi hotspots without the hassle.
+ Skype for iPhone: Now you can make Skype calls over 3G.
+ Record all your calls: better than telephone quality.

http://www.skype-voip-upgrade.com

All you need to get up and running with Skype is…

+ A PC or Mac computer.
+ An internet connection (broadband is best).
+ A webcam to make video calls.

To learn more about this upgrade, please go to Skype Upgrade Center at:

http://www.skype-voip-upgrade.com

Let’s change the way we think of telecommunications.

Thank you

Cherie M Walford

Skype Upgrade Center

Copy rights Skype 2010 – All Rights Reserved
Website: http://www.skype-voip-upgrade.com

Anyone else got these e-mails? If you’ve clicked on any of the links already, you REALLY need to learn the concept of a “scam”. πŸ˜›

Alright, let’s start with Adobe. Pretty good e-mail, but… why would they e-mail me to announce a new version? There’s a tool that’s installed WITH Adobe Reader that does that automatically (I’ve turned it off, because Adobe Reader is irritating :P). Also, why would they put “DOWNLOAD ADOBE ACROBAT READER” in caps? Or even put it there at all? They’ve already given the “download link” before that. Which is clearly a fake. Because you’d get the new version of Acrobat Reader at Adobe.com. πŸ˜› They’ve also separated the words “Copy” and “right”, and there’s a copyright symbol next to Adobe 2010, as well. Which is hilarious, because it’s not needed. πŸ˜› It’s like saying “PDF Format”, basically, “Portable Document Format Format”. πŸ˜›

The Skype one is worse. “Valued Skyper”? They USUALLY say “hey <username>”- this fool should know that if he’s ACTUALLY a member of Skype. πŸ˜› “On behalf of Skype Inc”?Β  Why would someone FROM Skype send it out on BEHALF of Skype? πŸ˜› “As-always trust and SUPPORTS”? “You can enjoy EVER more enhanced features”? Bad, BAD grammar. πŸ˜› Also, from what I’ve come to notice, Skype’s e-mails are full of bubble-like graphics and are pretty casually written, so recieving a plain text e-mail just three hours after recieving that Adobe e-mail of the same style basically GIVES it away. πŸ˜› They wouldn’t tell you what you need to get up and running with Skype, either, because I HAVE SKYPE, and already know. πŸ˜› PLUS, there’s an update feature in Skype, which says there are no updates. πŸ˜› And on top of all that, they’ve separated the words “Copy” and “right”, and put an S on the end of it for some reason. So this is the same idiot sending these two e-mails. πŸ˜›

Also… on both of those e-mails, right at the bottom? “Powered by YourMailingListProvider”. LOL. πŸ˜› They’re both big companies. I THINK they can take care of their OWN mailing lists. πŸ˜‰

No, I’m not done JUST yet. I’m just gonna point out that the HEADER of these e-mails doesn’t mention Skype at all. Another (legit) Skype newsletter goes like this, “from skype.outbound.ed10.com by mail.o2.co.uk”, showing that my mail server recieved the message from Skype’s own mail server, before bouncing it to another O2 mail server, and then being downloaded by me. However, this fake shows “from smtp.ymlp33.net by mail.o2.co.uk”. πŸ˜› Ya see, it’s so easy to spot a phishing e-mail. Just read it, and look in the e-mail header if you want to. πŸ˜€

And that’s HOW, FOR NOW!

AH HA HA HAAAAAA!

I was right about APB. Guess what? Realtime Worlds has gone BANKRUPT. Because of that game. Their SECOND game.

See? If you’d just LISTENED to everyone, maybe you’d still be around. But no, you said “Ah, let’s reward players and clans who top the Leagues with EVEN BETTER WEAPONS, even if the clan is only winning BECAUSE THEY’RE BIG!”

Oh, and it didn’t help that the missions sucked, the matchmaking sucked, the maps sucked, the balance sucked, basically, EVERYTHING sucked, because you can’t make games anymore and think it’s a good idea to go for an MMORPG… sorry… “MMORPG”, for your SECOND game. Plus, you’ve also made EA lose time and money, because THEY are having to clean up the leftovers by mass-mailing every sucker who bought APB and offering them a free EA game.

Stop, look, think, listen, THEN act. Realtime Worlds didn’t do that, and now they’ve gotten run over by a bus. πŸ˜›