MY HEAD’S GONNA IMPLODE IN A SECOND!
Ya, so for all those people who read my blog (now 2, or 3 if you include Si) then my SISTER found this page! And NOW, she’s sending me insane about my story! She’s like, not shutting up about it and doing my head in because I won’t show her the other unrefined 30 something or other chapters! GAH!
Trust me, the chapters are CRAP unless I go through them and fix mistakes and add stuff.
Oh great. Now she’s told my mum. Oh, soon enough the whole damn world’ll know that I’m writing this story!
I dunno how she figured out how to get onto my space… oh wait, there’s this star next to all your contacts who’ve updated all their info. Ya. DAMN THAT STAR!
Ah well, at least she didn’t say it was crappy. I know the first couple of chapters are good, but the rest just DON’T WORK YET! Now Michelle, if you’re reading, first (EH?!?!?!) thing is that (Ehehehe… Hello, I shop at Netto!) (Don’t worry everyone else. That’s just me and my sister’s thing.) the chapters 4 through 30 something are NOT DONE YET! Ya?! Right? They’ve been written, but they SUCK! They have next to no description and Word keeps flying up my ass about "WORDINESS" and "SPLIT INFINITIVES" and "PASSIVE VOICE"! So until all the green lines are gone, you’re not seeing that chapter. Unless there’s green lines under the Draconic writing, because they’re just some random words that make no sense. Apparently, one of my Draconic sentences is 6 nouns in a row. SIX?! They’re NOT NOUNS, DANGIT!
Okay? Hopefully you won’t keep asking me to let you read it now. And for christ’s sakes don’t friggin tell the whole WORLD ABOUT IT! It wasn’t even meant to be SHOWN to anyone, because… uh, well… I DUNNO! Call me paranoid or something! I only wrote it when about 3 or 4 other people were writing their things! Like, Ant was writing about vampires and Em was writing about the end of the world and Christine was writing about… something… that was ages ago, what was she writing about? Ah well. So all I did was just join in! Like, silently! For some reason! C’mon, it was depression week or month or something! EVERYONE was bored! Oh wait, I wasn’t depressed.
But don’t bother trying to find it. You’ll never find it anywhere but here.
Oh crap… wait, I told you… that it’s double password protected in my hidden folder… OH CRAP! I TOLD YOU AGAIN!
Okay, well… I’ve like, set another password on it’s folder. That you won’t get. It’s also encrypted with Blowfish Algorithm, so even if you knew how to crack, you’d never get through Blowfish. It’s also Read Only.
Haha! Now it’s double-password protected in a password protected hidden encrypted read-only folder!
Wait… how do I get in?
Haha, only joking. I know how.
Right, I’ll upload like the 3rd and 4th chapters soon. Maybe the 5th, too.
If ya still think I could show you EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW, Meesh, then no. Lemme put it to ya this way: Chapter 2 was HALF the size that it is now, before I reviewed it. That nifty first paragraph didn’t exist, and some statements didn’t even make sense. Imagine what the 3 page chapter 23 or something will be like after I’m through with it.
Did I mention that one of the characters never even EXISTED until I modified Chapter 2? Oh, and that chapters something like 7, 8, 9 and 10 were a complete waste of time and are so bad I’m gonna have to delete them all and fill in the hole in some way or another?
So, all in due time, dude, all in due time.
AHA! I’ve got an idea! I can use my story chapters as CURRENCY! Yeah, I’ll pay you in words! A penny a word! Give me about like, £350 and you can have all 35,000 words!
Nah, I’d rather not embarass myself and show a story that looks like it’s been written by some dumbass. Ya, at the minute, about 30,000 words of it suck. Well, okay, about 20,000, because some chapters are okay.
(PS: OH CRAP! I just figured out that I put down how to get into my space in one of my entries! Gah, I’m such a dumbass! It was meant to be a SECRET Michelle, until it was done! Plus, I didn’t think you’d like it, so… hey, wait a sec! How many stories do you read about people getting blown up or something? None? Great! That’s why I didn’t expect you to like it. So HA. Plus, your reactions in Eragon with the dogfight with Zaphira kinda led me to that decision, too.
(PPS: OHMYGOD! Matt Scott’s Personal Message is "Gone to the gays!" AHH! MATT’S GAY! GAYGAYGAYGAYGAYGAY! Wait, did I just realise that?